Episode 42: Famous sex therapist (& her husband) debunk sex myths

Vanessa Marin one of the most influential sex therapists on the internet, helping millions of people better understand themselves and cultivate deeper, more fulfilling relationships. In her personal practice, she has worked with thousands of clients, gaining firsthand insight into the challenges couples face behind closed doors.

 

Alongside her husband Xander, the duo has built a movement rooted in honesty, humor, and practical advice—making conversations about sex more approachable than ever. In Vanessa's personal practice, she’s worked with thousands of clients. In 2024, they released Sex Talks, which became an instant New York Times bestseller. Their work has even earned praise from Dr. John Gottman, widely regarded as the foremost expert on relationships over the last 40 years.

 

In this episode, we’re diving headfirst into the topics that so many people struggle with but rarely talk about. We tackle the biggest sex myths that hold couples back, the truth about mismatched sex drives, and how to navigate those all-too-common dry spells. We break down the art of initiating sex, explore the psychology of sexual fantasies, and unpack why communication is the key to a satisfying sex life.

 

This is a raw, insightful, and fun conversation that will leave you with a new perspective on intimacy and connection. Whether you're with your partner for the long-term or just looking to understand yourself better, there’s something here for everyone.

 

Timestamps:
0:00 - Intro
1:23 - Starting a sex therapy business together
10:31 - The fairy tales we believe about sex
21:24 - How kids get in the way of sex
32:33 - 93% of couples have dry spells
44:06 - How sex drives actually work
48:44 - The physical-emotional conundrum
54:25 - Should men initiate sex?
58:06 - Worst initiation techniques
1:02:09 - The Six Initiation Styles
1:08:14 - Understanding your partner’s body
1:14:22 - Faking orgasms
1:17:02 - Women don’t orgasm during sex?
1:25:17 - Sexual fantasies

 

Follow Vanessa & Xander on social media:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vanessaandxander/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@vanessaandxander

 

Mighty Pursuit Links:
Website: https://www.mightypursuit.com
Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/mightypursuit/
TikTok:  https://www.tiktok.com/@mightypursuit/
X: https://x.com/MightyPursuit

 

Related Episodes:
Dr. Ian Kerner: https://youtu.be/EkCzHTEkSWk?si=Aknq0P1_Bms-8Re3

 

Visit our Sex Hub:
https://mightypursuit.com/sex

 

For business inquiries: hello@mightypursuit.com